. elsewhere . . letters from the inaccessible .


21 June 2001
summer solstice

sol stitium

So it has, apparently, been six months since the winter solstice.... For most people, they stop and take stock of what's going on in their lives, what direction they're headed around the New Year. I, of course, do the same thing. But for me, it's also punctuated by periods of self-reflection around the main astronomical events of the year: equinoxes, solstices, etc.

But then, some say even the days between are punctuated by altogether too much self-reflection as well. I don't need a special event to bring that sort of thing around. So, here's the brief overview of the last six months.

Three days after the last solstice was my last sunday at University Presbyterian Church. Spiritual crises not being foreign to me by any means, I've since proceeded into a very agnostic period, that is, the very literal meaning of agnostic, that I don't know exactly what I believe anymore, but my beliefs still cover the basics. Beyond that, I don't know.

January was brutal. 80-hour weeks at work between the project from which I've since been forcibly removed by a foolish client and the other, good project: the official Spider-Man Movie Website. It was also a month of high phone bills. More on that later.

February. A very high point and a lot of minor low points. I fell in love. In case you couldn't figure it out.

March. A very low point and a lot of small high points. I got my heart broken. I (in collaboration with the best damn Web team ever assembled) launched the Spider-Man site to record traffic, a happy client, and a 40-hour workday which stretched from 8 am on the 22nd to 12:15am on the 24th. Did I mention the broken heart?

April. More low points, and no special high points to speak of. Bitter, bitter, bitter month. Again, in case you couldn't figure it out.

May and June. I'm still too close to all the events to find anything special to mention about them. Suffice to say, the heart is mending (some weeks are better than others, some weeks I don't miss her at all, some weeks the channel turns itself back on and I simmer in the loneliness), the Spidey site is still going (stay tuned kids, we're cooking up some damn cool stuff), and I started exercising. I'm now about 20 pounds lighter than January. I've one last notch in my belt before I have to resort to buying a new one. And several pairs of pants I have would fall right off my sorry ass if I didn't wear that belt cinched up. The best part is, it wasn't all that hard. I just needed to actually start doing it and keep doing it.

In the last 6 months, there are some things I would certainly change, but very, very few things I regret. I fell in love, I had my heart broken (now for those of you who don't know me well, I don't speak either of those two phrases lightly), but the beautiful things were scintillating, and the ugliness would have found me whether I had ever been in love or not, it always does.

musings of señor prod.

The Revolution keeps, um, revolving.

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©2001 Timothy A. Clark -|-